sneezle said: Hey, sorry to bother you, I just have a friend whose suffering with depression, and I'm not sure how to handle things well without unintentionally hurting her. we've been friends for about two years now, and I still don't know how to reassure her that she's not hated, and I'm not secretly only interacting with her to laugh at her behind her back. I was wondering if you knew any general tips for comforting a friend with depression, since I've proven time and time again to be rather poor at it.
That’s the thing with depression- it warps your mind into thinking awful thoughts about you and your loved ones. I like to compare it to building a wall around yourself or rolling up like a hedgehog- depression makes you feel horrible and isolated and all you want to do is lash out at people who care about you.
I don’t know how old you + your friend are, but I think it’s time she gets help- there’s no amount of reassurance you can do to make her feel better. Her chemicals are all out of wack & she needs to seek therapy, & get on medication.
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline’s 24 hour toll-free crisis hotline, 1.800.273.TALK (1.800.273.8255) can put her into contact with her local crisis center that can tell her where to seek immediate help in ya’lls area.
There are so many options, but I’ll list a few down below:
Mental Health America affiliate is an excellent resource for information about local programs + services (including affordable treatment).
Network of Care offers information including descriptions of community treatment services.
Psychology Today’s Therapy Directory to search for mental health professionals in your area
Therapist Referral Network at 1-800-843-7274 and 1-858-481-1515 provides referrals to individual mental health professionals.
GoodTherapy offers a searchable database of over 1600 counselors and therapists worldwide.
Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (patient to patient recommendation section)
There are SO MANY options out there for your friend, but she needs to take the first steps.
If you guys are still under your parent’s households, she’ll need to talk to them about it, which is a painful and often an embarrassingly raw conversation (which I didn’t end up doing, until I was out on my own as an adult and didn’t need to go through my mom, because of stigmas it made it difficult for her to understand I was suicidal/depressed/anxious from around aged 10 on).
I hope this helps you!